He’s sitting well now since about six months (‘about’ – I can’t believe I’ve failed at keeping milestone dates already). Whilst he shows no interest in crawling, he’s constantly grabbing my hands to pull himself up on his feet. No teeth yet but he’s eating like his greedy mama. There’s not much he doesn’t like. I make fish pie, stews and casseroles and he chomps them all up. Dessert though, I think he would climb out of his highchair for. Continue reading “Sammy lately / Seven Months”
My little boy is seven and a half months old. I have no idea how many weeks anymore; I lost count at thirty when life got really busy. It sort of feels like we had a bit of a tricky time for a while, where I was trying not to sink. There was so much to do, people to please and hideous hormones flying all over the place. My self esteem was low. I don’t know if I’m the only one, but I found the last few months way, way harder than the newborn stage (yikes, I’m sure I’ll laugh at how easy this stage was at the next. We haven’t hit teething yet. Fool!). The early days came naturally though. Sammy would sleep and whilst he did suffer from some tummy pain, he’d never scream relentlessly. Yes, there were times where I’d call my mum in desperate sobs for help. But that was more often than not because the state of the house was getting to me (how does a floor get so filthy?). More recently, it didn’t seem so easy. Continue reading “Wobbles”
From about four months, Sammy began to get fussy with breastfeeding. Since then I battled hopelessly, until a few weeks ago at seven months when he dropped his 4am night feed.
It had amazed me in the first place that he’d taken to it with ease. He was a speedy little drinker, with no problems latching from the moment he was first in my arms. I didn’t care about the toe-curling pain in the first few weeks because I loved it so much. I imagined a year of cosy nursing cuddles after a bedtime story and lazy snuggles in the morning. The pictures are there on Instagram; the co-sleeping earth mamas with their littles suckling under their t-shirts.
This blog has been neglected lately (not that I was all that good to begin with).
There are two reasons, I think.
Between you, my little one and starting up a business, my brain has been overwhelmed.
Secondly, I went and told people, didn’t I. People knowing about this space of mine (not that they will ever return, I’m sure), kind of scared me away.
Will I carry on? I want to more than ever. I am an incessant hoarder. A collector of pictures, of tickets, of words; anything that might have a memory attached. I always have been. The thought of not recording everything about this period of my life and letting it slip away with time terrifies me. These moments feel so fleetingly precious that I want to preserve them as best as I can. For me.
So I’m here, all self-conscious. And I wonder if that will change how I write. I cringe at the soppiness of my previous words. But that’s ok I think. I still have a besotted new Mama pass, right?